Kentucky is a buzz with Cicada love. Make the most of your hot cicada Summer with these 17 tips for enjoying the 17 year brood!
The Derby is over, but there is still money to be made. Throw those suckers in a circle and the race to the edge is on. Everybody wins because you can't tell them apart. Please don't use steroids.
****Do not consume cicadas if you have a shellfish allergy****
Every news publication is about to run a zany article about cicada recipes, but I bet none of them will mention Twice Baked Cicadas! Prepare exactly like you'd make twice baked potatoes. Crispy, buggy, gooey, cheesey, what's not to love? Just be sure to write your enemy's name on the tray if you bring them to the church potluck.
Shish-kebab them in an air fryer (not sponsored)! I've never used an air fryer, but everyone is always talking about how everything is better when cooked in an air fryer, so this seems like a perfect combo. Alternate fresh cicadas and seasonal vegetables from your local farmer's market for plenty of nutrients. Mmm crispy, I think.
The perfect chip for cicadipping! Fry 'em up for chips, or mash em up for dips, it's a choose your own snack-venture! The eyes, look at the eyes!
I've had cow milk, soy milk, almond milk, and even tried oat milk, but cicada milk will be truly groundbreaking. Straight from the earth, strained through a cheese cloth for a cold glass of creamy, earthy, frothy goodness. We'll call it Cicadairy. Or maybe Cilk.
Cocktail recipeYou may have heard of the Grasshopper cocktail (very green, very minty), but the Cicada cocktail isn't a thing yet, so it's up to you! I'm not much of a cocktail connoisseur myself, but just stick one of those babies on the rim of a glass for garnish, and now you're drinkin'!
Get craftyScratch that etsy itch with a scratchy macaroni cicada necklace! Relive your childhood. Take some yarn and weave it through, alternating the hollow noodle of your choice (macaroni, penne, rigatoni, etc) with hollowed out cicadas. I've never needed to make a neat hole in a cicada, but I'm thinking one of those coffee stirrers, or the shish kebab skewer you used above.
Hopefully you have some leftover yarn, because now it's time for cicada beaded curtains! Perfect for when you accidentally don't have a door on your room, but you still want to make noise when walking in and out. Bzzz.
With a similar construction technique, you can have a set of cicada wind chimes for your front or back porch. Probably a little less clangy than normal, but I imagine these will sound like lightly dropping dry cereal onto the countertop. Very soothing.
Corner preachingYou've tried telling people about the end of days before, Y2K, 2012 starring John Cusack, but now you have definitive proof! We've had fires, floods, pandemics, and now swarms! Everyone will be forced to take you seriously this time with the brood before their very eyes!
RelaxationTake your bubble bath to a different plane of zen with cicada fizzies. Nothin' fancy to it, just drop them in, and let the all natural jacuzzi begin.
White noise machineFill a jar with fresh cicadas, making sure to poke holes in the lid so the noise can get through. It'll be just like sleeping under the stars with the rhythmic cicada mating asmr right by your very own bedside.
Accessorize, accessorize, cicadaccessorize!Barrettes were so last year, now it's all about cicadas. You don't even need a clip or anything, just sorta put it up there, they stick to everything.
Brooches are back, baby! This time you don't need a roach, you can just substitute a cicada. Again, they love to cling, so just place it on your upper bodice, and you're in business! You can expect to receive many compliments such as, "May I just say, those beady eyes look absolutely marvelous this evening."
1. Put a cicada on someone's back.
2. Put a cicada in someone's shoe.
3. Save a bunch in the freezer so when winter rolls around, you can put them on someone's car after it snows. They'll be like, "Cicadas? At this time of year?" Little will they know, it was just you prankin' up a storm, because you love pranks.
We've all been cooped up for a long time, but they've been cooped up underground for even longer. Cicadas are great listeners. Tell them about how weird the last year has been. Did you learn anything fun about yourself? Practice making eye contact. Cicadas are great at eye contact.
We hope these tips help you break out of your shell and get back into the world this Hot Cicada Summer! And if you can't experience them wherever you are, give our Wet Hot Cicada Buzzline a call and grab your very own Cicada T-Shirt!